If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!

Dear Magdalo Soldiers (especially the ones who are on the run),

You did it all wrong!

In conducting that fiasco now known as the “Oakwood Mutiny,” you may have won the sympathy of many Filipinos, but you’ve also turned off perhaps an equal number of them.

What you’d like to do is win the hearts of a majority of your countrymen, if not all. Here are some pointers on how you may be able to do it.

1. Find a pimp with a lot of influence. ABS-CBN seems to fit that role very well. They are a national pimp. The only risk with this is ABS-CBN might nary give you a side glance. So you go to plan #2.

2. Be a boxer and try to rise up the ranks a la Manny Pacquiao. Try not to settle for an undercard fight, lest you become completely ignored a la Jimrex Jaca, whose fight was actually more impressive than the Pacman’s, but who didn’t merit entrance into the august offices of Manila City Hall.

Once you’ve attained championship status, compose a song. It doesn’t matter whether you can sing or not, whether it’s mediocre or not. As long as you have it carried by Star Records, it’s bound to be a hit (but only as long as you’re famous).

The risk of this plan is that you get knocked out of oblivion and this is a long way to win the hearts of Filipinos. To go a shorter way, you might want to do this:

3. Join Pinoy Big Brother and stick it out for 3 months. I’m quite sure you’re PBB quality. Whether you get to be top housemate or not, you’ll still become famous, because ABS-CBN will milk every talent that passes under its aegis to get back its investments. The risk here is you might get evicted even before you can say, “kuya.”

4. Become an actor and then run for the Senate. Here you’ll have a legal medium to denounce the government and find allies who’ll denounce along with you if the price is right or the showboating is worth it.

The risk in this move, however, is that you might enjoy this circus …er… political sphere and rise to be President and become like the very person you want to topple.

So you see, my Magdalo heroes, you don’t have to start a coup d` etat or armed uprising. Just try to win the hearts of Filipinos everywhere, because we’re so forgiving and forgetful; we love soap operas (no matter if they come from Korea, Mexico or Timbuktoo); we drool over and then vote for airheads into political office; we like to watch mindless reality TV shows; we can’t differentiate between popularity and intelligence; and, last but not least, we never learn.

Click here to send money to the Philippines with Xoom. ONLINE & CONVENIENT – LOW FEES – GUARANTEED. Send now.

Whaaaattt!!! A national holiday on the day of Manny Pacquiao’s return? Aren’t we overdoing it just a bit incredibly? So, ok, he won against El Terrible in an unforgettable boxing match, but did any of Pacman’s dollars trickle down to me? Or any of my screaming, idolizing Filipino brethren. Nope, nope and nope.

True to Filipino form, Sen. Ramon Revilla Sr’s proposal to call for a national holiday is overkill. Just like ABS-CBN’s nauseous airing of everything that Pacquiao does. Just last night they featured a story about Manny Pacquiao’s family missing him and excited to see him.

Susmaryosep! That’s not news. That’s called pimping! Perhaps they want to get enough mileage out of the boxer so his mediocre song, “Para Sa Iyo,” makes platinum sales. Didn’t they get enough already by airing his commercial-laden fight? Their pre-fight advertisements declared that the fight would be “live.” That was an outright lie. Even before the televised fight ended, text messages already announced The Pacman’s victory.

This is not to belittle Pacquiao. In fact, he stepped out of Filipino character by disciplining and preparing himself to face Morales who, by the seventh round, looked confused on how to deal with the “new” boxing strategy of Pacquiao. However, the aspect of his training should be the rallying point of all that is about Pacquiao in that if Filipinos set their minds on accomplishing something with perseverance, they will succeed.

Yet, like Sen. Revilla, we veer off-focus by extolling Pacquiao for uniting the nation. Uniting in what? As far as I am concerned, the only unifying factor was bringing a majority of Filipinos in front of TV and pay-per-view screens to watch the fight on a Sunday when most were at home anyway.

For sure, let’s give Manny Pacquiao a victory parade with ticker tapes and all. Let’s all cheer him until our voices get hoarse. After all, he upheld Filipino pride by beating a Mexican to a pulp. And he did it fair and square (eat your heart out, Thai Prime Minister Shinawatra) in front of a worldwide audience.

Then, when all is said and done, let’s hunker down to a more disciplined way of life doing our every bit, WITHOUT COMPLAINT, to lift ourselves and our nation from the doldrums. This way we will eventually unite our country and will even be able to call ourselves heroes.

Click here to send money to the Philippines with Xoom. ONLINE & CONVENIENT – LOW FEES – GUARANTEED. Send now.

In the news today, we are told that Congresswoman Imee Marcos (should we still place Manotoc at the end?) warned Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo not to trust former President Fidel V. Ramos.

I had a wonderfully, good laugh!

Get this: The eldest in a family that plundered the Philippines for some 20 years is warning a President, who has cheated the elections and lied to the Filipinos, about a former President who was once the enforcer of Ferdinand Marcos and his repressive Martial Law.

That’s Philippine politics! It can make you laugh. This is why former Sen. Tito Sotto can glide with ease from comedy into politics and then back again into comedy (he’s back in “Eat Bulaga”).

Yet, that’s the irony. Since Philippine politics is run by a bunch of clowns, it is cause for the Filipinos to be very, very sad.

Click here to send money to the Philippines with Xoom. ONLINE & CONVENIENT – LOW FEES – GUARANTEED. Send now.

Amidst all the dreary news we find stories of inspiration.

One is about US Army Sgt. Myla Marasvillas. Born in Bohol, Myla immigrated to the US with her mother in the 90’s. She was 16 years old then. Instead of looking for the time-honored career of nursing, she opted to join the army.

On Christmas eve, on a patrol in strife-torn Iraq, a rebel rocket slammed into the armored vehicle she was riding in, killing her. She died in the call of duty. Although she died as a US citizen, it can be said that it was her Filipino blood that gave her the courage to enlist in such a high-risk occupation.

She will be buried in Bohol with full military honors.

The other story is about 12-year old Cristina Bugayong. Cristina lives in a shanty with her family in Quezon city. One day, as she was playing with friends, a motorcycle whizzed by and a satchel fell off. Looking in the bag, Cristina discovered around 300,000 in cash and checks, more than enough to feed her poverty-stricken family for months.

Yet, without second thought, she returned the satchel to its rightful owner (after two other impostors tried to claim it).

Cristina’s deed landed in the papers. Inspired by her act of honesty, many businessmen rewarded her and her family with other gifts that, if totalled, would exceed the amount of money she returned. Honesty, indeed, has its benefits.

President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo even sought audience with her. It is my prayer that she will not grow up to be like GMA.

Click here to send money to the Philippines with Xoom. ONLINE & CONVENIENT – LOW FEES – GUARANTEED. Send now.